Len Kagamine x Depressed!Reader || [red to black]

                Feel it cutting into me, the doubting painful knife
                Feel it deepening the rift, finally hit just right
                Couldn't take the love I had, so weak and burning low
                But it grew into a weapon only hurting me, this I know

                ...is nonfiction

    The crimson blood slowly started to drip in the sink, causing it to leak down into the drain. A sigh sounded from your mouth. It wasn't the average tired sigh, but a relieved, content one. The pain is releasing from your wrist and into the drain. Turning the sink on, water quickly mingled with the blood and washed it out.

    You looked up to see yourself. You were an average kid... with secrets and... awful parents. You heard a drunken gurgle from the vent and you just grunted in irritation. You pulled down your sleeve to hide your cuts and walked into your room.

    No friends, no real family, no happiness, no life. Well, that's what you thought.

                So good with numbers, science, math I like
                But I'm terrible at English so I despise
                This part of me that wants a simple "right or wrong"
                And I feel that everything I choose will always be false

    You were seated in Math class, next to a blonde boy and a teal-haired girl. There was a test and, you would obviously ace it. But today something felt off, strange... weird. You stared at the paper, wondering if the answers you chose were right or wrong. You didn't know if you were correct. Shaking your head, you just continued the test, lost and confused.

                And today
                This homework
                About me
                A blank sheet
                Accomplished
                Content with
                This life I will now live
                'Til I think why are we
                just sometimes no always
                Saying how we're sad and
                Saying how we're lonely? 

    Homework about yourself. Like what you wanted to be when you grow older, your best friend, best classes, most hated songs... Why did you struggle? You had thought you knew yourself completely well. You sat at home and leaned on your desk, staring at the paper.

    Your eyes started to tear up for no exact reason and sobs started to erupt. Luckily you were home alone so your parent wouldn't barge in here and get annoying about you crying.

    This was inhuman of you. You shouldn't be crying this hard. What's wrong with you? You should be thrown in an insane asylum. You haven't cried this hard since your mother died.

    To be honest, it wasn't just about feeling like breaking down.

    It was the homework's fault.

                Can you even read the blackboard written clear as can be?
                Can you even read his mind? See that kid's lost fantasy?
                Can you even find the one who dyed his red heart to black?
                Hey, who could it be?
                Hey, someone tell me!

    You went to school once more, wearing your favorite hoody. It was really hot out but why should you care? You ran into a blonde-haired girl and she introduced you to her somewhat large friend group. Her name was Rin Kagamine, she had a brother named Len Kagamine. Her best friends are Miku Hatsune, which is always bubbly and cheerful, Gumi, the pervert, and Neru Akita, the tsundere.

    They invited you to sit at their table and you did. However, you didn't want to eat. You were fat enough already. You just stared at the slop and wondered how they could eat this crap.

    "Aren't you going to eat?"

    A voice sounded beside you and, what everyone does, you turned your head to look at Neru. I thought she didn't like me? You thought and blinked your eyes a few times before mouthing a "What?"

    "You should eat, stupid. If you don't, you'll become anorexic and that's not sexy at all," Neru Akita said roughly, moving her head back towards her food and continued to eat.

    Sighing, you mind as well eat a little...

                Can you even solve the question with your abacus yet?
                Can you even stop the rope from hanging him by his neck?
                Did we really choose it right saying we're okay this way?
                Hey, just tell me how
                It's not like I care now

    You bonded well with Len Kagamine and to be honest.. you liked him. He was a large reason to live and, without him, you're nothing. A small grew over your face as you stood in the shower, staring at nothing. You reached over to grab the soap and you noticed the cuts on your wrist. You didn't even realize you started to cry and... you continued your shower.

    Is the point A or B? You thought, frowning.

                Counting days like numbers, they all pass their prime
                And again hypnotically swimming through time
                Behind the power and guards I put up
                I hide
                Knowing they had long died 

    You've been crying everyday and it's creeping you out. Letting out a sigh, you stared out the window and listened to the rain lightly pat against the window.

    How are you Mom? I miss you. And dad too. Is daddy okay? I hope so. I'll join you soon. You gripped the necklace on your neck. I promise. A tear rolled down your cheek, which caused you to stand up and leave.

                From problems
                My resolve
                Just can't solve
                That homework
                Accomplished
                Content with
                This life I will now live
                'Til I think and he speaks
                That demon inside us
                Saying "let me just leave"
                Saying "someone kill me!"

                Can you even read the blackboard written clear as can be?
                Can you even read his mind? See that kid's lost fantasy?
                Can you even find the one who dyed his red heart to black?
                Hey, who could it be?
                Hey, someone tell me!

    You screamed and threw the knife at the shower curtain, causing it to rip. You cried and started slamming your gripped fists on the counter, sobbing. Getting frustrated, you looked up and stared at the mirror. You were a wreck. Hair everywhere, droopy clothes, runny nose, red, puffy eyes, tear-stained cheeks with tears STILL running down them, a bitten lip that oozed crimson, and dark bags under your eyes.

    You screamed once more and aimed to smack the mirror, but you wobbled a bit and fell onto the floor on your side.

    There you were at peace.

    Hidden away.

    Who did this to you?

    Who caused this?

                Can you even solve the question with your abacus yet?
                Can you even stop the rope from hanging him by his neck?
                Did we really choose it right saying we're okay this way?

    Tightening the rope around your neck, you were on a chair. Sobs escaped you as you kicked the chair over. You immediately fell, the rope wasn't tight enough, and fell into someone's arms. You started to sob into their shirt uncontrollably.

    Not bothering to even look at the person.

    What's the point?

    You were going to FAIL school anyway.

    Live in a cardboard box down the street.

    Begging for change and crying every night.

                Hey just tell me how
                Hey just tell me how!

You walked into school, angered and feeling threatened. You were exremely anxious and paranoid, constantly tapping your foot and looking behind your shoulder.

You remembered it all.

    "YOU'RE GOING TO PASS SCHOOL OR YOU'RE GOING TO GET BEAT AND THROWN ON THE STREETS!"

    "WHY ARE YOU YELLING ATM E LIKE THIS? WHAT'S EVEN GOING ON?"

    "YOUR GRADES ARE FAILING AND THERE'S PILES OF HOMEWORK ON YOUR DESK. MOSTLY ABOUT YOU! GET TO WORK, BRAT!"

    
    You only remembered blonde hair from the person that caught you. You eventually had passed out and woke up on the bed. Sighing, you stared at the test.

    I lost it all.



    "Grow up, (Y/n)! You're cutting, anorexic, and suicidal! You need help!" Rin said, grabbing your sleeves and pulling them down, revealing the cuts that were all over your arm.

    "I'm fine! I don't need your pesky help!"

    "Why are you cutting?" Haku's calm voice sounded behind Rin.

    "It's none of your concern."

    "Tell us! We care (Y/n)!" Miku cried out.

    "You're also doing awful on your tests. What the hell is going on?" Neru sounded, scowling at you.

    You squirmed out of Rin's grip and stepped to the school's wall. They cornered you. It was the end of the day and, they invited you over but... you were stuck.

    You started to tear up and shouted,

    "Can you even say the formula of area now?
    Can you even scream the dreams you swore would never go out?
    Who was the one who let my hopes just curl up die?
    Hey, who could it be?
    No, it's gotta be...
    Just open up your eyes, why don't you grow up and see?
    But what the hell is "growing up" and tell me when will I be?
    Can a single person out there just explain it to me?
    Hey, just tell me how
    It's not like I care now!"

    You turned around and sobbed softly, planting your forehead on the brick wall and cried. Two arms embraced you and put their chin on your head comfortingly, whispering sweet nothings.

    The male yet feminine-like voice sounded,

    "You'll make it (Y/n). You have us- and me. I love you, remember when we went to the movies and our hands accidentally touched? How we both were blowing on each-other's necks and; we both did at the same time, resulting in an accidental kiss?" Len... Len was behind you. He snuggled his chin in your hair.

    "Be my girlfriend, (Y/n). We can sort this out together. I caught you when you fell and I'll carry you to Paradise. Give me a chance to help you fix all of this."



    You let him.

    You may have lost your parents, failed school, got anorexic, suicidal, depressed, and lonely, and got confused,
but you have Len.


    He turned my black heart into red once more.